The Weight of Waiting

 
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You may have heard that we are a fast-paced, instantly-gratified generation. The reality is, we live in a time where the things we want and need are accessible with, quite literally, a few taps from our fingertips. Not only are material things at our immediate acquisition, but also our connection to people/ stories/ news/ ideas across the world. The portal of influence is rapidly widened for our benefit while simultaneously works to our potential disadvantage.

Our access to these things has contributed to the evident dissatisfaction and emptiness in our lives that have become a spiritual epidemic for our generation. Our eyes, minds, and hearts are continually stimulated with the highlight reels of so-and-so's life and exposes what we don't have. The curated content of another has created a foothold in the very thing we are meant to steward and guard with reverent care– our hearts.

A question I’ve often asked myself in the thick of dissatisfaction or demanding situations across my relationships, workplaces, and communities is, "Should I stay or should I go?" It's as if my mind is hardwired to alert me by posing this question when the going gets tough, suggesting I err on one side to prevent disappointment. It's quite a task to think much of it than to follow the natural course of my mind’s reflex in the presence of hardship. The third option that ought to be included in that question, however, is one that contradicts our flesh, and that is to wait on the Lord.

If your story is anything like mine, you may have frequently and prematurely asked yourself, "What is my next step?" Like many in this fast-paced generation, I had a tendency to look five steps ahead and neglect what I've been entrusted with right under my nose. Dissatisfaction crept in as soon as I lifted my eyes from my own assignment and noticed the possibilities of additional gains or better opportunities around me. And so, I began to collect ideas and strategies to create my own plan. While it seemed harmless and even noble, I initiated assignments on my own accord, apart from the Lord. Admittedly, each project that was off the radar never arrived at its completion and I found myself back at square one, fatigued and ironically enough, disappointed. It's only in hindsight that I can see myself rushing from one thing to the next, unwilling to stay and wait on the Lord. 

The act of waiting is far from being stagnant or idlepatience is tested, control is challenged to be relinquished, and gratification is both delayed and examined. It is the silent war of our inner-world. Our hearts undergo a refining process that enables the ability to shut down our fleshly tendencies and calibrates our hearts to seek after our good portion in the Lord. Waiting for things worthwhile does not come easy, yet what's worthwhile is exactly that– absolutely worthy of its process. The weight of waiting is not so much a preference than it is a matter of obedience. And by the grace of God, it's in obedience we gain Kingdom perspective and spiritual reward that fulfills and expands our hearts in ways incomparable to the world's best offer. 

The Psalmist David fixes His gaze on the sovereignty of God & conveys his steely trust Him through his worship and faith-declarations in Psalm 33. Verses 6-11 says, "By the word of the Lord the heavens were made, their starry host by the breath of his mouth. He gathers the waters of the sea into jars; he puts the deep into storehouses. Let all the earth fear the Lord; let all the people of the world revere him. For he spoke, and it came to be; he commanded, and it stood firm. The Lord foils the plans of the nations; he thwarts the purposes of the peoples. But the plans of the Lord stand firm forever, the purposes of his heart through all generations."

He goes on to say that God, who fashioned each of our hearts, considers everything we do and that no one can save themselves despite the best of human efforts (Psalm 33:14-17). The restlessness, hastiness, and weariness we experience are a result of displaced hope– hope that is placed in the false security of this world and the fleeting praises of man. What would our waiting season look like if our gaze was fixed on the sovereignty of our God? What would the condition of our hearts be as we reposition our hope in Him? How would our desires transform and our follow-through actions take shape as we wait on His guidance and discernment?

Perhaps we will find the good portion like David did in his waiting season. Perhaps we will find ourselves genuinely and joyfully professing:

"We wait in hope for the Lord;

    he is our help and our shield.

In him our hearts rejoice,

    for we trust in his holy name.

May your unfailing love be with us, Lord,

    even as we put our hope in you."

Psalm 33:20-22

Monica Han is currently serving as the worship director of Thanksgiving Church’s Lifepoint Ministry. She loves quality cuppa, conversations, and creative projects. She is also a minimalism enthusiast who believes freedom from materialism makes sustainable room for generosity, deeper relationships, and prolonging hunger for the eternal things.

 
Daniel LeeComment